Churchianity

April 6, 2008

private jet donated for ministry on the move

Filed under: mega church — churchianity @ 5:34 am
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There were lots of ‘Praise my Lord!’ at Pastor Peter’s church recently when news came through that the congregation had banded together to buy the much loved Pastor his first private Jet.

Pastor Peter commented,

I Praise my Lord and thank the generous folks for this new Jet. It is an affirmation of what God has called me to do, to preach the Good News of God’s provision to the poor of the world.

Funding for the completion of a new local soup kitchen was put on hold to fund the Jet, but as Elder John commented, (more…)

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March 31, 2008

job vacancy

Filed under: church management,mega church — churchianity @ 4:46 pm
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This in on the email:

“Dear Hairy Platypus, I love your blog! In particular the name, the content is poor but the name is great.

felix-unky.jpgWe recently received the very sad news that our much loved church pastor, Felix Unky is leaving, he feels God is calling him to write a popular book so he can make enough money to buy a large ministry house on the coast.

So we are on the hunt for a new pastor. Please could you post the following advert?

 

Wanted: Dynamic Pastor to take the church to the next level

The Jupiter Hill Church is looking for a new dynamic Senior Chief Supreme Pastor. We are a church of 3,500 but have plans to grow that to 1.2 million by the end of the year. The Pastor has to be: (more…)

March 24, 2008

big church, big chairs

Filed under: mega church — churchianity @ 8:03 am
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Now that every church is certain that the only path to success is by having a Mega Church, a number of companies have sprung up to meet this new demand. One such company is SCS (Small Churches Suck) who provide specialist furniture specific to Mega Church needs. SCS CEO, Bob Chuckpants states,

We at SCS understand that small churches suck and do all we can to provide the successful church with all the furniture they need to be cool and have lots of people attend and stuff.

big-chair.jpgThe big hit for SCS has been the range of very cool Mega chairs for the Mega Church. Known as the ‘Big Dreamer’ range they come in 38 colors and all include an image of the senior pastor on the back.

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